Question

【題目】假如你叫李華，你們學校正在創(chuàng)建“和諧校園”活動，倡導人人都做文明中學生。請你根據(jù)以下提示，給你的英國筆友Peter寫一封郵件，告訴他你認為做個文明中學生什么是重要的，你通常是怎么做的，以及你的感受。

郵件的開頭和結(jié)尾已給出，不計入總詞數(shù)。所給提示詞語僅供選用。請不要寫出你的校名和姓名。

提示詞語： think, smile, respect, say hello to, wait in line, on time, happy

Dear Peter,

How is it going? At my school we’re talking about what we should do to be a good student.

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Anything new at your school?

Yours,

Li Hua

Answer 1

【答案】Dear Peter,

How is it going? At my school we’re talking about what we should do to be a good student.

To be a polite middle school student,I think we have to do a lot of things. First, It's important for us to speak politely. We must respect the others. When I meet someone I know ,I often greet him by saying hello to him happily. We are supposed to be kind to others, warm-hearted to everyone, and generous to our friends.Second, we can't throw rubbish everywhere. We must throw them in the rubbish bins. Littering is not a good habit. Every time I go to the park, I always pick up the litter and put it into the bin. I think if we all do so , the world will be cleaner.Anther important thing is that we must follow the rules . There is no doubt that waiting in line is the important rule. I never rush into the bus.Waiting may be a happy thing. I often feel happy when I do something that is better for us. I think being a polite middle school student is proud.

Anything new at your school?

Yours,

Li Hua

【解析】試題分析：這篇作文乍一看很難，學生可能不知道如何入手，但是提示詞很多，比如smile，respect，wait in line等，所以學生都會有話可說。但是不代表這篇作文很好寫，第一個問題是有陷阱的，學生很容易只表達what，進行描述卻沒有解釋導致扣分。需要注意的是第二個要點，你平時是怎么做的？所以文章應該寫成夾敘夾議，主體部分分點論述，談談自己平時是怎么做的，對于學生來講，難點在于每說一點怎么做的，都要加上這一點的原因或者影響。最后一點要注意扣題和升華，孩子們?nèi)菀撞莶萁Y(jié)尾，談不出有深度的感受。這表明中考對中學生的認知能力和社會理解能力提出了更高的要求。這篇作文也符合中考改革的方向，強調(diào)知識運用和文化理解，把語言用在生活中，將應試和能力更自然地結(jié)合起來。

寫作亮點：這篇短文夾敘夾議，句式豐富，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，語言流暢。多種句型的應用為文章增色。如：It's important for us…, We are supposed to …, if we all do so..., ...when I do something that…,等。明確提出個人觀點，針對個人觀點闡述自己日常的文明行為。使用了熟悉的句型和表達方式，沒有語法錯誤，符合題目要求，是一篇優(yōu)秀作文。