Question

【題目】書面表達：

請根據(jù)下列表格的提示, 寫一篇題為Changes in My Hometown的短文。（80詞左右）

內(nèi)容要點:

過去	現(xiàn)在
1.舊房	1.高樓
2.河水骯臟	2.河水清澈
3.步行、騎自行車上班	3.乘公交車、小汽車上班
4.道路狹窄	4.環(huán)形路寬闊
5.居住條件差	5.居住環(huán)境舒適

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Answer 1

【答案】

Changes in My Hometown

In the past ten years, great changes have taken place in my hometown. In the past, there used to be old houses. The river was very dirty. The roads were narrow and the living conditions were hard. People went to work on foot or by bike. But now, there are many tall buildings in my hometown. The river is clean and the water is clear. There are many ring roads and the living conditions are comfortable. People usually go to work by bus or by car.

I am glad to see these great changes in my hometown. I think my hometown will be much more beautiful in the future.

【解析】

試題分析：這篇作文要求我們描寫一下家鄉(xiāng)發(fā)生的變化。題目中用表格的形式給我們列出了幾個方面，包括居住的環(huán)境、上班的交通工具、道路等。我們需要將這些變化用正確的英語表達出來。寫作時，可以有兩個結(jié)構(gòu)來展開，一個是把每個方面的過去和現(xiàn)在對比著寫出來；還有一種是先把過去家鄉(xiāng)的樣子描寫出來，再來描寫現(xiàn)在的樣子。相比較來說，第二種結(jié)構(gòu)較為集中，層次顯得比較清楚。文章中涉及家鄉(xiāng)過去的樣子的，要使用一般過去時態(tài)；描寫現(xiàn)在時，用一般現(xiàn)在時態(tài)。因此要注意每個句子中動詞形式的變化。同時還需注意使用比較好的短語和句型，句與句之間使用恰當(dāng)?shù)倪B詞，使整篇文章意思連貫。

寫作亮點：這是一篇比較優(yōu)秀的短文。作者按照題目要求描寫了自己家鄉(xiāng)發(fā)生的變化。短文的開頭第一句話是一個亮點，In the past ten years, great changes have taken place in our hometown，這句話中作者使用了現(xiàn)在完成時態(tài)，先點明自己家鄉(xiāng)發(fā)生了很大的變化。接下來作者詳細(xì)描寫了具體的變化，先寫的是家鄉(xiāng)過去的樣子，這一部分主要使用了一般過去時態(tài)，從題目中給出的五個方面進行了闡述。這部分中較好的句型有In the past, there used to be old houses、The roads were narrow and the living conditions were hard.等。然后作者用but進行轉(zhuǎn)折，下面開始描寫家鄉(xiāng)現(xiàn)在的樣子，But now, there are many tall buildings in my hometown、There are many ring roads and the living conditions are comfortable。最后作者發(fā)表了自己的感想I think my hometown will be much more beautiful in the future.，我想我的家鄉(xiāng)在未來會更加美麗。整篇短文意思完整，結(jié)構(gòu)清晰，表達流暢。